Bradley's overdose - It was supposed to happen. As you read through the following entries, you will have a complete and better understanding of why I believe

"IT WAS SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN"

It was exactly eight years ago tonight that I received a call that no mother wants to hear. I was living in Sherman Oaks, California and I was taking a nice warm bath when Sydney answered the phone and it was one of Bradley‘s friends frantically telling Sydney (thinking it was me) mama Shell - Brad‘s not with us, he’s not with us he’s convulsing, they took him away by ambulance. The next thing I know a sheriff from Radford, Va was calling my phone. It was then that he told me my son had an OD on drugs. I asked the sheriff where they took my son and it was a dinky ass little hospital in a town called new River Valley. I asked to speak to the Doctor Who was taking care of my son. As he answered the phone and I could barely comprehend what he was saying, All he had to say was your son may die, he overdosed on drugs, he is on a ventilator and I don’t know if he will die. Once I heard the word die, there was no way I can even explain the pain that went throughout my entire body and down to my knees I fell. It felt like every part of me was on fire it was heartache like no other, not even my mom died. Couldn’t even compare to the pain I was feeling that I may lose my son, my hero. Even though I was feeling so much pain I was still able to get my faculties together and asked the Dr. If they were equipped to care for my son. The Dr. advised me that they weren’t. I then asked him where the closest trauma center would be and he told me that he would have to put Bradley on a helicopter (flight for life) and it would be in Roanoke, Virginia. The last words I said was ‘well what are you waiting for”. So it would be.... unbeknownst to Bradley, He was on his first helicopter ride. The tears wouldn’t stop rolling, the pain got worse and worse, I couldn’t reach anybody in Virginia like his father and it was truly a fucking nightmare and my worst most excruciating pain. 

After the 45-minute helicopter ride he arrived. The hospital's name was Clarion Roanoke Memorial Hospital and Medical Center. Once I was able to contact the emergency room the doctor taking care of Bradley‘s case informed me that he has no control over his care and that once they deal with an overdose it is turned over to poison control. Poison Control could not come up with an anecdote. Without going into detail of my son's toxicology report, the doctor informed me that his best bet was to stay in a medicinal coma so that his lungs could stop bleeding, his kidneys could function better and because he was combative when they went to intubate him. He also had a bad sore on his tongue not to mention his blood pressure was out of control. He had to go through intubation a second time and while doing it bit off part of his tongue. The Dr. advised me that if he did wake up he would probably have moderate to severe brain damage. I can’t explain to you in words how much grief I felt. I actually felt what it was like physically and emotionally to lose a child and that is the worst pain felt in the history of all mankind. All I could do was pray and believe me I most certainly did. The loss I felt this day and the next several was a cure-all at the time for everything and anything I’ve ever been through in my entire life and to think this was supposed to happen? Who Knew? Continued...

All My Love ~ M

04/12/2020

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